What: The
necessity of shameless days in bed with a collection of feel good movies and
books, lots of books.
Who: “the hopeless
romantic who can’t get her shit together”.
Warning: I
am feeling a tiny bit ranty.
I, so far,
have watched Love, Rosie; Magic Beyond the Words; What If; Two Night Stand;
Begin Again; Remember Me; Stuck in Love and, get ready for it, Bridget Jones’
Diary. I contemplated watching Christmas
movies, but they almost always involve family parties. And when I think of
family parties, I think of the phrase “How is your love life doing?” or “Are
you in the friend zone?” or “How can a girl looking like you still be single?”
or “You should really look for a boyfriend, go out more.”. And I never replay
by saying what I actually want to say. I just say “Whatever happens, I’m not in
a hurry. I have other things to do rather than running after some guy.”. Often,
that is enough to shut them up for a little while. Especially when I tell them
the running after some guy line. They give me “the look”. The oh no she is a feminist
now look. I love that look. But I would much rather would have told them
something completely different. And it goes a little bit like this:
“Dear
close-minded person,
Firstly, there
is no such thing as “my love life”. And this is not because I have a loveless
life. It is because I only have one life, mine. And there is so much I can do
with it. Therefore, my success in life and the way you see me should be based
upon the things I accomplish and how I have accomplished them. Not by the
person/people who just happened to stand next to me while doing so.
Secondly, I
am not in the friend zone. If that is even a thing. The way I see it, the friend
zone is this thing people assume they are in when they have fallen in love with
a friend and do not dare to tell them for they are scared it will ruin the friendship.
I can understand that fear. But, I also think that you should tell that person
how you feel. Who knows what might happen. And if nothing does, fine. If the
friendship is worth it, it will survive.
Thirdly,
very close-minded person, I would want to say that good looks can only get you
so far before the inside starts to show. But, then you might assume that I am
ugly at the inside. And I like to think otherwise. So, I’m afraid you are a
lost case.
Lastly, I don’t
like to go out. Never have, never will. And no,
this does not make me antisocial.”
But, even
if I said all of this exactly the way I meant it, it probably won’t have the
impact I want it to have. The person will probably be quiet for a while, a
little bit baffled. The silence will become too awkward and we will part ways.
Then, when the awkwardness has past, that person will rediscover his or hers
ability to speak. And from this point on it won’t be long before the sentence “She
is so dominant. No wonder she is still single.” Is outed. *sigh*
My dearest
close-minded person, it is probably not your fault. But please, do try to get
your shit together. And if you do, feel free to join me for a shameless day in bed with a collection of feel good movies and books, lots of books.
